The 3 Destiny
...the life-long path of EXPRESSION
"The value of words is often underestimated.
Like smudges on a pair of spectacles, they have the
ability to blur everything you do not make crystal clear.
Listen with great care to what is being said and choose
your own words as if they were diamonds"
COMMUNICATION is your purpose in this life-time. You are
learning how to communicate effectively. You will find that problems
arise from lack of communication or when you express yourself
inappropriately. Words are the key to your success and happiness.
But until you learn what must be learned on this path, words can also be
You entered this lifetime for the purpose of
communicating something specific and important. However, it may
take a long time to remember what it was you came here to express.
It may take you even longer to find the most convincing way to express
it. Until you understand that communication is your purpose for
being here, words may forever be a problem rather than the tremendous
talent they are meant to be.
Consequently, you may talk incessantly while
communicating relatively little. Or, you may believe you are a great
communicator when, in fact, you dominate a conversation because you do
not know how to listen. Communication is an ongoing exercise in
output and feedback - receiving and delivering valid information.
If you do not learn to listen attentively to others, you may gain the
reputation of being superficial.
Whatever your most constant problems in life are, they
are all "clues" to the direction your communications should take.
The 3 destiny has given you a tremendous talent or "way" with words.
You have used words to talk your way out of many a sticky situation,
haven't you? What you may not realize, however, is that it was
your own words which caused many of your sticky situation in the first
place. The point is, 3, you must find a purposeful outlet for this
The following 3 destiny people have unusual and memorable
voices. Or, they have the ability to use their voices in unusual
ways: Bill Cosby, Melanie Griffith, Barbara Walters, Alan Alda,
Rod Stewart, Joan Rivers, Kevin Spacey, Tracy Ullman, Katie Couric,
Pierce Brosnan, Jerry Hall, Dionne Warwick, Connie Chung, Billy Dee
Williams, John Travolta, David Bowie, Robert Townsend, Johnny Mathis,
Harry Belafonte, Celine Dion, Jodie Foster, Gloria Gaynor, Peter Graves,
Herbie Hancock, Phil Collins, Hillary Rodham Clinton, Dr. Ruth
Westheimer. Similarly, people remember your voice because there is
something unusual about it. This ensures that when you do remember
what you are supposed to be communicating, and when you do find the
appropriate words, you will be listened to and remembered.
3s have a tendency to deny or "play down" their emotions
- how they really feel. They are more concerned with giving the
appearance that everything is o.k., even when problems are obvious.
Others can be impressed with the way you seem to bounce back from
adversity as if nothing ever happened. Until they get to know
Eventually they realize that you have been holding all
that emotion IN instead of expressing it and allowing it to leave your
body. Once others see through your facade, they become frustrated
by your lack of emotion. Friendships are lost because others feel
you do not want to help yourself. But, of course, they do not
understand your complex nature. They do not understand your fear
that friends will be lost if you burden them with your problems.
3s are notorious for "keeping up appearances". They desire
popularity and social acceptance. They have a tendency to turn
their problems into jokes. This way, no one has the opportunity to
criticize or find fault in them.
3s guilt exists because it is the energy of joy and
lightheartedness. Many 3s mistakenly believe that they are not
allowed to show any emotion other than happy exuberance.
Consequently, they live "shallow" lives. But when 3s dare to go
beneath their own surface and accept that their emotions are as real as
anyone else's, their lives become deep, indescribably beautiful, and
richly creative. You are attracted to creative people because you
secretly admire their ability to feel.
Until you learn to take yourself more seriously in this
regard, others will not be able to take you seriously either. And,
with all that natural talent you have inside, just waiting to be
accepted and expressed, this can be a very frustrating way to live.
The trick, of course, is to take yourself seriously without becoming too
serious. Humor and laughter are vital ingredients of your
personality. They provide the "finishing touch" to genuine
Although happiness is a major part of what you are meant
to be communicating, you will be unable to develop the language you need
until you, yourself, are able to feel happiness. And that's
the problem: There is a huge difference between humor and
happiness. Ask any professional comedian about that. You
will never be able to feel and experience genuine happiness until you
let go of all that sadness that is buried deep inside; all that grief
you are refusing to accept and express, and all that anger and fear you
are burying under what you call your sense of humor.
3s want and need to be popular, and there is no more
popular position on Earth than that of making others feel "good" about
themselves. Whether you know it or not, this is the position you
came here to fill. However, it is your "experience in the field"
that will decide when, or whether, you get the job. How much experience
with happiness have you actually had?
3s gain this experience by having the courage to do what
they want to do; to do what their natural energies urge them to do.
Not what they hope will please other people. Not what they believe
they are limited to because of lack of opportunity, funds, or education.
Self-approval, and not just its appearance, is what you must strive for.
Then you can live free from the worry of who you should be pleasing or
trying to impress. You must learn to impress, please and be
Stop worrying about what others think of you. Peer
pressure has always been the source of much unhappiness in your life.
You are afraid of your emotions because they are so intense. But
your feelings are nothing to be afraid of. Why is it that the most
emotional people in the world are also the most creative? And why
are the most creative people also the most successful? Because they are
driven by the way they feel.
3s are so afraid of being hurt, that they bottle up their
feelings, especially the feeling of fear. Appearances,
physical and otherwise, play a very large role in your life, and this is
perfectly natural for you. Accept your natural desire to be
attractive, popular, and appreciated. But notice how you cling to
the trivial and mundane because you are afraid of taking anything too
seriously. Rather than risk the pain of failure or disappointment,
you tend to view opportunity as potential trouble, rather than potential
happiness. Remember all the opportunities that have slipped through your
fingers over the years. Remember the ones that slipped
conveniently into the hands of someone you thought was a friend.
And that brings us to the next important aspect of the 3
destiny. FRIENDS. It may take you a whole lifetime to realize what
friendship really is. Eventually, time and circumstances will teach you
that people change along with their priorities. So do the feelings
people have for one another. It can be painful for a 3 to realize
that they no longer have anything in common with someone they believed
was a life-long friend. 3s are highly influenced by the opinions
and lifestyles of friends. So much so that they do not bother to
use their own creative powers to be original. What was once
considered to be friendship often turns into resentment. These are not
easy aspects for you to deal with, let alone admit to. But please
don't run away from this experience. Only by facing these issues
will you be able to see the enormity - and sheer beauty - of your higher
potential. And isn't the quest for your higher potential the reason you
are reading this book in the first place?
Just remember that it is not your role to keep everyone
happy or to sacrifice your own happiness in the name of friendship or
social acceptance. This is the negative side of the 3 destiny in
which the happiness you came here to experience will forever elude you.
You are a natural performer, but there is no need for you
to be "on stage" all the time. Your natural energies thrive in
natural surroundings. When you are calm and centered, you will
find that your greatest inspiration comes from nature itself. You
must learn to be comfortable when you are alone with nature; alone with
yourself. Part of learning how to communicate is to "listen", to
accept feed-back, and to "change your act" when the feed-back is less
than enthusiastic. Listen very carefully, and allow others to have
Deep down, 3s know they are meant to communicate.
Some assume that they must, therefore, always be right. If you do
not listen to what others have to say, you cannot know if you are right.
You will miss the other side of the story. Without the input of others,
you cannot learn anything new. This is a difficult lesson
for a 3.
Do not be swayed by popular opinion. We are living
in times of great change. Therefore, what may have been true yesterday,
may not be true today. Be willing to learn new things and
your communications will always be fresh, entertaining, and inspiring.
There is no need for you to be constantly talking, gesturing, making
people laugh, gossiping, and expressing what you have heard about other
people and popular trends. Your ability to listen must be
3s are often found in the beauty business or other
creative fields. This is a good start. But, eventually, you
will realize that surface beauty is only an illusion. Your true
talents will emerge when you learn to look beneath the surfaces of
things and people. Then you will discover - actually see - the
reality of what you are dealing with. You will know whether these
things and people are what you really want in your life. Never
judge a book by its cover, or a person by their "look". It is all
veneer. True beauty is a matter of what is going on inside.
Creativity is one of the most precious gifts that the 3
energy offers. When your imagination is free from the masochistic
bonds of peer pressure, your creative capabilities will astonish you and
everyone around you. Your approval is the only approval you need.
It will come when you realize just how much positive and creative energy
exists inside you - under the surface. It will come when you allow
yourself to feel this energy. And, when you do, there will be no
question as to whether you take yourself seriously or not. No one has
more potential for creative genius than a 3. Unfortunately, it is
also true that no one is more prone to wasting this potential than a 3.
This does not have to be the case with you.
Your urge to follow popular things and people, and to
establish a position for yourself in society, is not without significant
reason. Your desire to be popular is part of the 3 experience.
You need to be liked. But you spend so much time trying to please
everyone else that you have no time to figure out what you are meant to
be doing for yourself. Many 3s give the appearance of being
superficial when, in fact, their feelings run very deep indeed.
Once you start to express your deeper feelings, your life will start to
unfold naturally and beautifully.
It can be difficult for you to focus on one thing at a
time. Your well disguised self-consciousness often outweighs your
ability to concentrate. You tend to scatter your energies in too many
different directions. Your ability to start things is impressive.
The problem lies in your ability to finish things. Here is yet
another reason why you feel others do not take you seriously enough.
And, ironically, one of the reasons you cannot focus on one thing long
enough to complete it is that you are worried, in the first place, about
the approval of others. It is a vicious circle until you learn to
take full responsibility for your own happiness, your own success, and
your own life.
When you worry about what others think of you, your
imagination becomes stifled. It cannot produce the creative
wonders that you are capable of producing. A free
imagination is LIMITLESS. You may believe that you are already
creative. Others may see your talent too. But it is probably
only a pale reflection of your true potential. If your ideas are
not original then your imagination is not free. Your ideas cannot
be original if they are based on pleasing others.
Your light and humorous approach, your optimistic
expression, your social inclination, and your emphasis on friends,
represent some beautiful 3 characteristics. Still, you must learn to
focus. Your concentration is prone to drifting, even to the point
of blackout, particularly when you are bored, unwilling to face a
particular reality, or unable to tolerate silence. Some 3s become
so self-conscious in a quiet atmosphere that they will talk about
anything in order to end the silence.
When 3s get talking, they can talk up a storm. They often
find themselves on one giant verbal roll. Sometimes they have a
difficult time bringing the conversation to an end. They appear to
be, and are, repeating themselves and talking incessantly. They
feel that they must communicate, even when they have nothing to say.
This is a negative trait until it is realized that, in social
situations, there is no need to fear silence and no need to constantly
prove how "sociable" and friendly you are.
Watching and listening to 3s telling a story or
recounting an experience, is quite an experience in itself.
The pitch of the voice changes according to the attention being
received. Watch how the 3 reacts to and interacts with an
audience, how he physically moves into the audience, how he draws the
audience back into the story, and maintains its attention.
He can repeat the same story time and time again, along with the same
mannerisms, the same sound-bites, and the same enthusiasm as when the
story was first told. If the listeners tire of the story,
embellishments are added to keep it exciting. When a 3s communication
skills are not developed, we see and hear a person who constantly
repeats the same old stories as if they are stuck somewhere in the past
and unable to move on. However, when a 3 realizes that
intelligent, timely, and purposeful communication is his or her function
in life, we see and hear a person who has the power to influence and
inspire the entire world.
When you really do focus for a prolonged period on
something you feel passionate about, you are truly a beauty to
behold and your form of expression remains fresh and alive. You
need to establish what you want from life and to surround yourself with
others who are pursuing similar goals. Finding what you want to do; that
thing that makes your heart beat faster and makes time stand still,
signifies a vital turning point in the 3 destiny which leads to the
happiness you are seeking.
You belong in a field or lifestyle that appreciates and
contributes to creativity, and offers an abundance of social contact.
If you are not involved in creative pursuits, then you need to be around
those who are. You are meant to be with creative, passionate,
emotional people so that you can understand the creative process, learn
to take your emotions seriously through their example, and find your own
passion - your own Will - your own creative dream - along the way.
Recognize your strong tendency to criticize or ridicule
others, especially in your younger more immature years, and especially
in reference to their appearance. These anti-social traits need to
be turned around into the positive so that you learn the art of
sociability. You can hurt other people with your careless use of
words, but if others criticize you, you can be cut to the quick.
Never dish out what you cannot take. 3 is the energy of
appearances, and your own appearance has manifested for the purpose of
making you memorable. The way you look is important to you, but
there is likely to be at least one physical aspect that causes you
concern. 3 is the energy of attraction, and you must realize just
how attractive you are when your emotions are free and you are being
yourself. Almost miraculously, when your emotions are free, your
physical appearance changes to meet your own approval. In other
words, if you believe you are beautiful, so will everyone else.
But remember we are talking about belief - not pretense - not the
appearance of belief.
Your ability to attract is part of your destiny
experience. But you must also be aware that as life proceeds,
appearances change. It is important that you learn to recognize
and move along with these changes. 3s often get stuck in
"time-warps", causing them to cling to people and things that were once
"fashionable", but are now clearly out of place. Popularity is
important to you, but it can only be maintained in the present,
otherwise the only people you will attract are those who are also
"stuck" in some long-gone segment of time. If you find yourself
surrounded by those who are constantly reminiscing about "old" times,
and repeating the same old stories, you may have to update your
understanding of living in present time. The only way to release
yourself from the anchors of the past is to release those old
unexpressed emotions that are holding you there.
Eventually you will learn that your appearance - your
physical presence - is a matter of what you are feeling on the inside.
Once you recognize your self-consciousness and learn to relax with
yourself, inside and out, you will start to attract the very people you
need and desire instead of a string of superficial "friends" who are
going nowhere and have nothing to offer.
You have the gifts of words, attraction, sociability,
creativity, optimism, memory, friendship, and humor. Use these
precious talents to see beyond what others see; to break through those
confines of popular opinion and dare to follow your own heart; to
do what you want to do; to accept and release the pains of life, so that
JOY can replace them, and not just the pretense of joy that many people
seem content with these days. Your purpose is to discover internal
happiness through your own experience and to communicate it externally
to others. You have the power to lift others out of that negative spiral
of gloom and doom in which so many are trapped.
Find your own happiness and others will realize that they
can find theirs too. Take yourself and your 3 destiny seriously, because
what the world needs more than anything right now is a serious dose of
3s optimism, beauty, and laughter.